Forgive? But they don’t deserve it!!

Ephesians 4:31 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Sometimes you read a portion of scripture and God speaks out so clearly you really can’t pretend not to have noticed what He was saying (yes, we all do it!) This chapter, Ephesians 4, is one of those. Paul speaks candidly about what is expected from a believer – the kind of behavior consistent with ‘living a life worthy of the calling we have received’ (verse 1). Go through it some time, you might need to write out some of those things and remind yourself daily… Ok, back to the focus of this post: verse 31 with particular emphasis on forgiveness.  

Paul writes that we should “…forgive each other…” which is where we would all like to stop but indulge me some and let’s complete the verse “…just as in Christ God forgave you.” That second part is quite something isn’t it? I read it this morning and was quite struck by it.

Me to self: We are supposed to forgive in the same way as you forgave us? Oh gosh Lord, that’s quite a tough one! I mean have you seen some of the people I am dealing with? God:  *pauses and raises His eyebrow* (yes – I like to dramaticize our conversations) *immediately my mind is taken back to who I used to be, and not just me, I’m quickly reminded about the weight of the sins of the world that was what was put on Christ!* Me: Uh well… I suppose… I should forgive, just as you forgave me. *tough one to swallow*

We are supposed to be ambassadors of God on earth – we are citizens of heaven, in earthly bodies… (We’re in this world, not of it) If we behave and handle people in the same way heathen do, how will anyone be able to tell the difference? (Matthew 5:47).  Our attitude in forgiving based on this verse therefore should be:

*We should forgive people in representation of God and His Kingdom;

*We should forgive people when they are least deserving (while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us – Romans 5:8). Hence the excuse: ‘She/he didn’t even say sorry!’ should not even feature. Choose to forgive regardless of their attitude;

*We should forgive people even when we are ‘sure’ they will slip up a couple more times – think about how often YOU have slipped up. God knew (and knows) that we will (and do) mess up sometimes and yet still chose to forgive us;

*We should forgive people even when they have the worst track record – it’s not about them, rather about you extending compassion and graciousness to them like God does to (and for) us;

*We should forgive because God has asked us to. We ought to walk in obedience.

I’m not completely clueless – some situations are harder to let go of and offer forgiveness because of the extent of betrayal and hurt the person(s) may have caused. Even then however, He has instructed us to forgive. His word says His grace is sufficient for us and in our weakness (for example, finding it hard to forgive), His strength is made perfect (2^nd Corinthians 12:9). He gives His (all-sufficient) grace to forgive too. Ask Him to enable you to forgive and leave the consequences to Him:

Romans 12:19 "Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord.

If God be God..

So plenty of times last year, I kept saying to my mum how I was not sure about doing my post-grad because of my perception of how hard it would be. I would constantly be whining and complaining about it  - how hard the work is likely to be and how I probably wouldn't be able to manage the pressure along with whether I would be able to keep up or even have a decent grade at the end of it all... yea, you probably get my drift. Most of the time my mother would give me an encouraging response on how smart I was (thanks mummy!), how other people had gone through it and succeeded therefore it was obviously not an insurmountable task.

This silenced me for  a number of weeks but I was always coming back to her with the same nagging questions of worry... What if I couldn't do it? Finally, taking her eyes of the road, she turned and looked at me straight in the eye and said: "Angela, If God be God then how can it be that you question His ability to guide and carry you through what is just another phase in your life?  Has His word not been clear, true and sure in the past?" (paraphrased).

This line 'If God be God...' has stuck with me for sometime now. I'm on the threshold of my post-grad studies and I do not have an inkling of worry or doubt about whether I will make it because I have digested this truth.

 However, I am reminded of this saying in different scenarios, when something 'different' or challenging comes up or when I'm talking to someone who's battling with walking in faith in one area or the other. It has been my experience that the mind comes up with endless reasons why lots of things should and will not work out - but it takes a faith-in-God-filled mind to declare that 'if God be true and all He says be truth, then I will confidently walk in this direction.'

Bottom line is this: If you are walking in the will of God i.e. in obedience to Him (both for the specific situation as well as your life in general) there are countless promises He has made to you that you need to walk in (or remind yourself of): 

*"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." - Joshua 1:9

*"I can do all this through him who gives me strength."- Philippians 4:13

*"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."- Deuteronomy 31:6

*"For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline." - 2nd Timothy 1:7

*For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." - Isaiah 41:13

So let me reiterate that wise counsel: If God be God,  If He is true then quit doubting, quit compaining and living in fear. He said He'd do it, made promises to carry you through and bes believe - HE's gonna fulfil every last one of them.

Tell somebody (pronounce ‘sum-badi’!)

I don’t know about you but so many times I have gotten encouragement just from people telling their stories or sharing what they learnt at Church, or in their personal devotion. Similarly, I’ve gotten challenged, encouraged to grow, taught and even rebuked on occasion simply from talking to them about something I’d been thinking about or had learnt in my quiet time or meditation.

It is vital for your growth that you share what you learn with those around you. It could be in a big bold way such as writing a book, blogging, sharing it in your Bible study or prayer group OR something as simple as sharing it with one other person: a friend, colleague, family member, chat buddy – bottom line is: YOU HAVE TO SHARE IT!

Sometimes there are one or two things we misunderstand, miss or find vague until we are engaged in conversation where the other person points out a truth or enlightens us on an angle that clarifies what was previously hanging in the balance.

Often, the word you share might be just what the person ‘needed to hear’ – God could be using you to deliver His word to them and by choosing to keep quiet about it for fear of ‘embarrassment’ ‘ judgement’ or whatever other excuse you come up with for not sharing, you miss out on being a part of God’s work in that person’s life. God’s blessings (His word included) are not meant to stay reservoired (not a real word) but to be channelled through to many others that need it. 

We are blessed to be a blessing, so if that word blessed you…you have a responsibility to pass it on and bless somebody else.